Dream Time, Yo
Listen up, internet! I had a dream last night, a very hip dream to say the least, but nonetheless still a dream.
I've been telling everyone this dream from left to right, I woke up with such a vivid and detailed dream, I just had to tell the universe.
So story time my internet people, time to enter my dreamy mind, sit down, grab some snickerdoodles and enjoy.
~
Ok so in my dream my mom was throwing a huge party at my house, and all the people there were oh so annoying, they were constantly talking bad about me, and I was like 'why le poop are you people here?'
So I swore at them and left to this mudroom area, when suddenly I saw this creep old lady in glasses trying to mess with my thermostat, so I went 'Old lady what the freak are you doing with my thermostat?' And she waddled away outside, so I locked the backyard door.
I found out that she was trying to make it super cold because she was a part of an evil gang that was set out to freeze my house, I found her breaking into my house again and messing with the thermostat, so I said and I quote, 'Lady, don't mess with my thermostat, my home is supposed to be a perfect 73 degree temperature all the time.'
And, then I punched her and dragged her body out the door.
Also, some context, I was dating Damon Salvatore from Vampire Diaries, YESSSS I did just say DAMON, FREAKING DAMON, THE UNIVERSE SMILED UPON ME FOR THIS DREAM I TELL YOU.
Damon appears with his group of friends after I've punched dear old creep ice lady, he says 'you know what this party blows, let's go to my house and we'll have a better party' I go um yeah when your gorgeous vampire boyfriend invites you to a party, you say yes.
So, Damon and I and his group of pals, get into a mobile vehicle as we drive to the Salvatore's house. When suddenly we pass by a river, where there are drunk college students on Spring Break, what a combo.
As we are passing the river, we then see bloody bodies floating in the water, Selena Gomez suddenly appears (because I guess she was in the car with us? Selena do you like vampires?) and she pulls out all the bodies, and counts that there are 12 bodies, exact.
I then remember in the dream that there was a creep cult man sacrificing groups of 12 people, and this must be another incident.
So, I said, hmm let's keep driving.
Butttttt as we were driving away the drunk spring breakers (who clearly were oblivious to their dead 12 friends) became possessed and started following us, like those psycho zombies from I Am Legend.
Except, Will Smith did not come save the day.
We get to Damon's house and the possessed spring breakers start attacking us, I get a magic baseball bat that a haunted doll gave me so I started hitting the spring breakers (no regrets.)
When suddenly I meet the evil wizard who has been sacrificing all these people, he then tells me that he wants me to be in his sacrifice, and I'm like H to the no.
So, I am able to get out of there with my beloved, Damon.....and his pals get out of there too, which I guess matters?
We get back to my house with the lame butt party because it's safe as a pin, so we are sitting around eating snacks from Costco, yes Costco.
When suddenly I receive a snapchat, from no other than the EVIL WIZARD, (who by the way looks like a 30 year old hipster weirdo, like bro go home)
The snapchat video shows all the possess spring breakers yelling at me, and the evil wizard says 'I am gonna get you'
And so I respond with a video, of me saying, 'Chill out, bro.'
~
And that was it, my internet people, I had an exciting, confusing, and beautiful dream, mainly because I was dating freaking Damon, my main man.
Let me know if you want more dream tellings.
Ciao.
OK one more Damon gif.
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